So after I say something, I have created the habit of asking my listener what s/he heard from me. I also like to check in on my own perceptions about what I've heard from someone.
Rather than assuming that my perceptions about what other people mean when they say something are accurate, I've gotten into the practice of asking if what I heard was what they meant to communicate to me.
Here's one great example:
I had assumed for a while that when my lover didn't ask for my support (because I certainly ask for his) that it was because he didn't think I had anything to give him. I was really upset about this story I was telling myself
